


Light Up

by absolutelyCancerous (cal1brations)



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Implied Relationships, M/M, Multi, Past Relationship(s), Smoking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-23
Updated: 2012-07-23
Packaged: 2017-11-10 13:54:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,140
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/467042
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cal1brations/pseuds/absolutelyCancerous
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“The smell… of the smoke…” Roxas murmurs, pressing the cigarette against his lips.</p><p>You are literally the most ignorant, blatant asshole in <b>all</b> of the worlds. Ever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Light Up

You don't really smoke often, because you know Sora isn't very fond of it, but some nights--after Sora's tucked away in bed and the likes--you like sneak outside and light up. 

It's not that you're addicted, so much as it gives you a reason not to go to bed. You're not really fond of laying around in the dark, praying sleep will come. Usually, it doesn't. Even when Sora's there to cuddle the nightmares away. Even when he leaves the bathroom light on, so you don't freak out too badly during the night.

Tonight is no different, as you close the front door behind you, cigarette pack in hand as you sit on the front porch. You like how the ocean seems louder at night; how it reminds you of sitting on the Dark Shore with Sora, almost waiting to /die/ there beside him--

You fumble to tug out a cigarette, hands almost shaking as you light up and take a long, slow drag.

It's pretty late, but you don't mind; you've always sort of been a night owl. For some reason, it doesn't seem all that dark to you--maybe because your eyes are adjusted to it, for the time being. You exhale slowly, thoughtfully, sighing in some sort of relief before you take another drag. 

There's some shuffling around in the house, but that's probably Sora (or Roxas using Sora's body to move around, the poor guy) so you don't look into it. Just casually nurse your cigarette, staring off into space with you mind racing too fervishly for sleep.

But it takes only a moment for you to hear the footsteps of Sora (or Roxas) come to the screen door; pause and stop for awhile. You glance over your shoulder, waiting for either to step outside, but they don't, so you just go back to breathing in and breathing out with the cig against your lips.

There's a sad little sigh, once you let out a mouthful of smoke, and you can instantly tell it's Roxas standing at the screen door. Shit.

You fumble with the cigarette, tossing it down and crushing it with the heel of your shoe. You hear a small noise, of discontent (you think?) from inside, but you don't chance a look. Simply sit there, sighing and wishing you had a stick of gum.

"Come out here," you finally say, though you don't look Roxas's way. 

You hear the door creak open, Roxas's near-silent padding of footsteps (compared to Sora's confident, bold steps; you think his are so quiet due to all those months in the Organization) come across the deck until he's sitting beside you.

Roxas and you have a very odd relationship. You get along with select things, and you try your hardest to be nice to him, but Sora says Roxas is maybe a litte shy of you, because he doesn't like to come out much when you're around, as opposed to when it's Sora and Kairi hanging out; then both of the blonde Nobodies take over, chit chat and just generally enjoy their special existence.

But Roxas is usually very quiet with you--although he said he's (remorsefully) forgiven you for beating him, and you've forgiven him, vise versa. He just sometimes sits with you when Sora's too tired to keep his flow of consciousness or Sora willingly allows him to take control.

"What are you doing up?" You ask quietly, resting your cheek in your hand as you glance at him.

He's silent, but he reaches for your pack of cigarettes, slowly pulling one out with hesitant, curious fingers. He doesn't light it, just simply turns it about in his fingers, looking over it carefully.

"The smell of the smoke..." Roxas murmurs, pressing the cigarette against his lips.

You are literally the most ignorant, blatant asshole in **_all_** of the worlds. Ever.

You're about to open your mouth, apologize a million times over for making Roxas miserable because _fuck_ , you've been trying so hard to just be friends with him to make Sora happy and now some stupid little habit you have is going to ruin all your hard work--

But Roxas looks at you with almost Sora-esque eyes, solemn and wide as he hands you the cigarette, maybe scoots a little closer to you.

"Please?" He asks.

He wants you to smoke it. He wants you to light up so he can smell the smoke and not be so absolutely fucking miserable here without his friends, without anything but memories from his life that was yanked out from under him.

You nod, and quickly light up once again.

Roxas scoots much, much closer this time; so that your knees bump each other and he's leaning into you, eyes closed with a small hum. You glance at him, and it's a little bit automatic when your arm wraps around his shoulders. The action startles him a little, but when you blow out your mouthful of smoke, Roxas nearly _whimpers_ , waving the smoke to his face as he breathes it in, coughing, but looking so sentimental it actually _hurts_.

He drinks in the smoke like that every time, waving his hands towards him like he's trying to grab at willowing coattails and pull them close to his heart. He looks so helpless, his mouth agape as he sucks in the smoke, desperate for it not to just be cigarette essence.

You smoke the thing down to pretty much nothing, crushing it with your foot when it's no longer of use. Roxas sits against you, breathing slow and deep, trying to make the smell of the smoke last. You pull him closer against you, sigh quietly to yourself.

Roxas catches this, your cigarette-smelling sigh, and presses himself closer, nearly bumping your noses together as he presses his lips to yours, slow and gentle and solemn.

You can almost _taste_ his loneliness.

He doesn't kiss like Sora at all; Sora gives you flurries of kisses. Excited, hyper ones--which you love very much. But Roxas's are more meticulous, calm and soothing, and you sort of like that, too. They're both extremely different, down to the way they swipe their tongue against yours.

When he pulls away, he doesn't smile, he barely even looks at you as he rests his head on your shoulder, whispering a "thanks" as he closes his eyes. Blonde curls fade into sharp brown spikes as Sora regains control, but he doesn't stir. 

You carefully manage to get him in your arms (because, wow, Sora weighs a _lot_ when he's dead weight) and shuffle back inside, tucking him in. You're about to leave, to go sit in the living room or something, but his hand grips your wrist.

"Stay."

It's not Sora nor Roxas who croak that one word. It's _both_.

You stay without another word.


End file.
